Menopause: A Patient’s Perspective

SHARON MACARTHUR is a menopause educator and the founder of Miss Menopause UK, an organization that focuses on corporate education about menopause. Her own journey through this life change inspired her to help others — particularly women in the workforce — navigate the symptoms and repercussions with knowledge and self-empowerment.

BSTQ: Tell us about your experience with menopause.

Sharon: My journey began at age 47 with night terrors: waking up at 4 a.m. with a feeling of impending doom. I began to feel exhausted. I just didn’t feel like me. Things I could do without thinking suddenly became really difficult. I couldn’t remember people’s names, and I was tired all of the time. I felt anxious about meeting people and didn’t want to go out. Then the disturbed sleep began. I seemed to wake up every hour, leaving me feeling totally drained. I took to Google to see if I could figure out what was happening to me. After hours of research, I realized I was probably going though perimenopause. This meant that menopause was on the way. I felt sad and confused. I was sure I was too young. Sadly, it turns out I wasn’t.

BSTQ: Tell us about what you called your “final straw” experience.

Sharon: I fell asleep at the wheel of my car while driving at full speed. Fortunately, I didn’t swerve or crash, but I was terrified when I nodded awake and realized what had happened. For many months after that, when I was driving, I would pull over every half hour for a power nap, petrified I would fall asleep and die. I knew it was my hormones, but I couldn’t control it: Menopause was causing this. Shocked, I began to ask my friends and family to see who might be going through the same thing. Surprisingly, older women I asked said they “just got on with it” but they hadn’t worked at the time. Friends my age didn’t seem to know what to expect. I was on my own.

BSTQ: What inspired you to start Miss Menopause?

Sharon: I found that there wasn’t enough information readily available for women like me experiencing such a huge life event. When I attended mental health courses to find out more information, I was shocked to hear that menopause is never even considered a talking point. It was then I decided to start Miss Menopause to create an outlet to both educate and support women through this time in their life. I am keen to educate employers on how they can educate all of their workforce about this subject and, most importantly, equip women with the skills as to what to expect and how to deal with this life event.

BSTQ: Why did you decide this was a corporate conversation?

Sharon: I was speaking to women who had left their jobs because they didn’t know what was happening to them, and the companies they worked for weren’t stopping them from going. They’d lost their confidence, didn’t feel as capable and some even thought they had early-onset Alzheimer’s. It frustrated me because men in their mid-40s are powering through their careers, enhancing their pensions and looking to take on more responsibility. At that age, so many women should also be hitting their professional stride — but then the menopause symptoms begin and throw them off kilter.

BSTQ: What workplace changes do you advocate?

Sharon: I don’t necessarily think companies need to create policies around menopause; they just need to educate their staff — including men — and demonstrate through action that it’s not an unspoken taboo. I’m sharing this information in male-dominated fields, and men are thanking me, saying it’s saving their relationships. Giving people space and permission to talk about their experiences is important. Many women suffer in silence and feel a deep sense of loneliness, and often shame, about their menopausal symptoms.

BSTQ: Why is talking about menopause important?

Sharon: When we talk about menopause, we have the opportunity to share advice. It took nearly 18 months and much trial and error for me to find a menopause treatment that worked for me.

BSTQ: How did you eventually manage your symptoms?

Sharon: After experimenting with sage tablets, magnesium baths and being wrongly prescribed antidepressants, I asked my doctor for hormone replacement therapy (HRT) after researching it extensively, and it completely changed my life. My symptoms faded away — it was a miracle. HRT often gets such bad press but […] it’s your body, your choice, and you must do your research, get the facts. On average, menopause lasts between five and seven years. Do you really want to put your life on hold for all that time?”     ❖